Lisa L. Frady, LCSW
The dictionary defines expectations as "a belief that someone will or should achieve something". What this means is that expectations are based on "shoulds"; rules formed by someone which they expect themselves and/or others to live by and when they don't then they judge them as being inferior. Expectations are Power and Control based. Expectations are a way to gain control by imposing rules upon another to get them to give in and do what is wanted despite that person not wanting to. "Shoulds" are one of 15 Styles of Distorted Thinking; #2 on the list. (See blog on the 15 Styles of Distorted Thinking)
Our societal construct is Power and Control based. Expectations are a fundamental part of our belief system. We throw them around all over the place right along with judgment. What are we actually creating through our societal construct? It's no wonder why there are such high rates of mental and physical health disorders in the United States.